I AM

I AM, I AM, I AM.

This is what's in my mind, but I still don't know exactly what it means. There are many meditations around I AM. I'm open to understanding, but if somebody asked me about it, I wouldn't know what to say. Maybe when I say I AM, I'm saying that I am everything, or maybe it's just that I AM as you see me in this present moment. I'm simply just AM. There is nothing more, there is nothing less. I’m nothing more and nothing less than what you see right now.

I simply AM.

This brings me to presence. To be present. A part of my mind is wondering what we are going to do after this, even though it knows the routine. It knows we’ll use the washroom, shower, get ready, eat some food, and head to a cafe.

But it wonders and wanders.

Nosara, Costa Rica

It's focused on the next instead of the present. It’s always tugging at the mind, sometimes gently, sometimes more aggressively. It’s hope, hope that if we go out there, we will find her. We certainly won't find her in this 594-square-foot condo. Here, it is just me being. Just me I AMing.

Her.

Who is this mysterious her? Is it one person, or am I—this part that tugs at my mind—seeking an idea of her? Ideas are fleeting. Ideas are always changing. Ideas are the opposite of stable. Even if you catch an idea, it is just an idea, like a seed is just a seed.

Now, I am someone who has many ideas, but maybe I need to focus on the idea of one. Like I’m focused on the idea of one project. Focusing on one idea is opening up multiple paths within my heart and mind. Focusing on one idea is generating energy that flows in many directions while I’m just I AM'ing.

The energy that accompanies focus is the water that nurtures the seeds.

I know it's confusing. Which I am, am I? The little or the big? It’s hard to tell. I’m still figuring it out myself. But I’ll let you know as soon as I know exactly who I am.

The Myth of Originality

Ideas resurface from the depths or appear out of thin air

It Never Expires

If ideas and creations want to revisit you, let them. Allow them to express themselves. The belief that everything you create must always be unique and different is a myth—a notion you’ve picked up along the way, or perhaps one someone else planted in you. Think of these recurring ideas that resurface from the depths or appear out of thin air as old friends bringing messages—messages they couldn’t share when they first emerged because circumstances didn’t allow them to complete their original work.These ideas are old friends visiting again, seeking to reconnect and spend some intimate time with you. They’re choosing you, hoping you can help them finish their journey so they can move on without needing another ride on the earthly merry-go-round. Sure, things may repeat, but don’t worry about that. Be grateful that this idea, this thought, this old friend has visited you once again. Allow them to express themselves fully. Listen with compassion and love, and be the vehicle that delivers their voice to the world.

Mystical spirits are everywhere. We simply need to see with our ears and hear with our eyes.

There Is No Such Thing as Original

There is no such thing as original. Whatever stories, paintings, ideas, and thoughts come through you, using you as a mechanism to be heard and expressed, simply are. What a privilege it is that the unseen trusts you to help them be seen once again. What an honour it is that they are willing to share the depths of their hearts, emotions, ideas, thoughts, and art with you. Your role is to keep this vehicle—yourself—clean within and without so that when they arrive, you’re free of clutter and ready to host both the unseen and the seen. Because, in truth, there’s no difference. We’re all here together. Sight can be both heard and seen; listening can see and be heard. Allow your senses to live fully. Don’t reduce them to a one-trick pony.

EVERYTHING

I have only one weapon, and that is my pen. Use it. Don't waste its unlimited ammunition. It is forever. All that is etched into this piece of paper is etched into the Universe. It is never for nothing. It is all for something. Do not worry about the naysayers inside and outside. Your heart's expression, its mark on this land, in this time, is not a nice-to-have; it is EVERYTHING.

From the Streets of Valencia, Spain

You are the beauty we are all waiting for; it will be received by the seen and unseen. Don't be discouraged, and don't look for outcomes. Each moment that your heart expresses upon us is a push in the right direction.

They speak about the third eye, the home of our intuition and critical to our awakening, but there is another eye that lives within your chest, planted upon your heart. Centuries of seduction have kept her sleeping, but their tears are our tears. Their sacrifice is our awakening. Don't let it be for nothing because it is everything. Don't you see the gift they are gifting us? Will you let their screams awaken you from the seduction of he?

Don't let it be for nothing because it is EVERYTHING.

From the streets of Valencia, Spain

Life is Precious

The cycle of life. Death and birth are constant. It is not a one-time event. To experience it as such leads to suffering. Some cycles are small, others are a little more noticeable, but it is happening often. Think about your day today. All that you did was left behind. It has passed. The suffering arises when we hold onto it. Tomorrow we awake again, newborn, a new day, a new opportunity. What a delight it is to wake up. How blessed, another day to make a little impact on the ones we love, the strangers whom we cross paths with, a smile, a gaze, a nod of acknowledgment. Then there is this earth, a little hello to the trees, walking barefoot in a park, absorbing the energy of her, the one who holds us, the mother from which we were all birthed.

Life is precious.

https://ago.ca/collection/object/2014/6

Giving Birth to Consciousness

This piece was inspired by a recent conversation with a friend: Do we have enough health and wellness practitioners? Enough alternative healers? The short answer is no—we don’t. The longer answer is that we're far from balancing the scales. Look at the health and wellness field compared to the industries that keep us in unconscious cycles—food, pharmaceuticals, media, and work environments. Just step into a grocery store, liquor store, or notice the number of fast-food spots and bars filling up daily in Toronto. We have a lot of evolving to do to reach a higher vibrational state, to live more consciously.

So, what is consciousness? It’s being present, making decisions in the now for the now. It’s hard, I know. Even after years of my own growth, I still have my unconscious moments. Living in a city filled with endless temptations, I say I dance between two worlds. My aim is to dance in the conscious world most of the time, and, hopefully, one day, fully.

When I indulge in unconscious consumption—processed food, sugar, or a night out drinking with friends—it pulls me down into a fog. The moment feels great, but the day or two after? I'm in a low-energy, detached state. As my friend Anam says, we’re borrowing happiness from tomorrow.

There’s a growing list of healers—naturopaths, nutritionists, energy healers, bodyworkers, meditation and yoga teachers—who aren’t recognized by outdated systems of government and insurance. Why? Because embracing these healers would disrupt industries with deep financial roots in food, medicine, and pharmaceuticals. Those in power play a short-term game, focused on immediate gains. I don’t blame them; change is scary, no matter how much planning goes into it. But an unknown future is better than a stale, outdated present.

It may seem like alternative healers are abundant, but in reality, they barely scratch the surface of what’s needed. As more health and wellness practitioners enter the field, we'll start seeing support from governments and corporations because, currently, many can’t afford holistic options outside what insurance covers. Instead, people turn to drugs from the pharmaceutical industry because that’s what’s accessible.

So, how do we get insurance companies and governments to invest in proven holistic approaches? By encouraging more practitioners and keeping open minds.

Alternative healing is still a new concept to many, but if we want to shift the collective mindset, I encourage you to explore these paths yourself. We’re moving towards a beautiful blend of old and new, East and West. But to evolve as a society, we need to make choices that either move us forward or hold us back.

Earth is like a mother on the verge of giving birth. This new baby’s name is consciousness. And it’s the healers I mentioned who are the doctors, guiding this birth, holding the Earth’s hand, urging her to push. We see the head; we hear the cry. But there’s work left before consciousness is fully delivered.

It’s not about old religions.

It’s not about past leaders.

It’s not about clinging to outdated systems.

It’s about you and me.

Let’s give birth to this baby.

Let consciousness scream, dance, and play with us.

Some are fighting this birth, but we can tip the scale. It starts with each of us nurturing our own abilities, discovering and unlocking them. Where to begin? Start by being conscious of where you place your mind. Humanity’s evolution depends on it.

No pressure.

Rocking Vulnerability: Embracing Fear and Finding Evolution

I've been reading and listening to Brené Brown's work for a couple of years now, and I've also been consciously practicing vulnerability. But yesterday, I took it to a whole new level. I was nervous all week, trying to prepare for this talk—it was uncharted territory. The last time I gave a speech was in grade 7. I made it to the gym and almost competed with other schools. My buddy Dave won; he was the better storyteller. Now, at 39, I'm a much different man (thank God). If I were the same, that would be a whole other problem.

Last night, I stood up in front of 150 strangers, some of whom were friends and family I had invited. I face-planted with a level of vulnerability that would have made Brené Brown proud. I was in the arena. I got up and wiped the dust off, and today was a brand-new morning. Even though I forgot most of my speech, I felt fucking good. That doesn't mean my self-talk was all positive. Absolutely not. I'm human.

My initial thoughts were that I had disappointed Greg, who runs the Toronto chapter of ManTalks and invited me to speak. I also disappointed Conner, the founder of ManTalks, and I disappointed the audience. They took time out of their Monday evening for this event, and I choked. I got stage fright. I tried to compose myself and start over. I'd get going, then get stuck again.

Finally, I just gave up and admitted to everyone that I had completely forgotten what I wanted to say and share. Afterward, my mind raced with all the things I wanted to say but didn't—all the experiences I could have shared in the hopes of inspiring others to begin the process of looking inward and connecting with themselves because lasting confidence and deep connections begin from within.

Yes, it could have been better, and yes, I could have rocked it. But there were lessons I needed to learn, and I'm glad I learned them early—on a big stage. Being in this area of public speaking, I know the size of the stage I want to strive for. I know the level I eventually want to play at. And I will say, by no means was this a small stage. Sponsored by Samsung, with a wicked ass stage, purpose, and the best part—a wonderful audience.

I was thinking about a quote by Jamie Foxx during his interview with Tim Ferriss. He said, "Do you know what's on the other side of fear? Nothing." I loved that, but I would take it to another level.

On the other side of fear is evolution.

We have been taught to see fear as something to conquer, but it turns out that fear is something to embrace. The same goes for failure. If you don't fail, how do you receive clarity on which direction to head? Failure is a beautiful compass that guides us toward our highest potential.

I want another shot so badly. I'm opening myself to the Universe right this minute. My heart is open and ready. Dear Universe, I'm ready to play BIG.

I don't know where this culture of perfection and the need to always look good to the outside world came from while we struggle and sit in pain in our internal world. It stunts the evolution of humanity and keeps our hearts closed. I'm sure there was a moment in history when we were required to close up, but honestly, I don't give a fuck. Where we stand right now is what's important. We all need to encourage each other to embrace walking in spaces where there's potential for face plants. It forces us to reflect and look inside ourselves.

I cancelled cable at 25. Do you know why? First, I was falling asleep on a hand-me-down IKEA sofa when I had a kick-ass mattress I paid enormous amounts of money for in the other room. The other reason was I was watching all these people, whether in fiction or nonfiction, living their lives while I wasn't living mine. When I turned off the tube, I had no choice but to get creative with my time. I met my first girlfriend, who gifted me my first book, The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho, which happened to change my fucking life. He talks about living your legend and how it should be your sole purpose—discover your personal journey and walk your path. This also led to my love of reading. Wow, there is actually a book and author out there that I could love. I always thought I hated reading, but in reality, I hated what the academic world was feeding me. Do you know we are still teaching Shakespeare? Are you kidding me? Our world is not ending; it's just stale, with the same old ways and messages. We need to liven it up by stepping into the unknown and identifying our own journey.

Do you know why people don't like meditation? It's not for the reason many say, which is, "I just can't sit down and quiet my mind." I had an aha realization. It's not the quieting of the mind that's the challenge; it's discovering what lies inside that's the challenge. When you begin the process, the goal isn't to calm the mind but to get into your mind, your body—specifically your heart—and then into your soul. When you get that deep, that's when the real shit opens up. That's when you start considering therapy and coaching because you have no choice but to discover your personal journey and purpose. It will rock your world and shake you up, but it's so fucking worth it.

Mirroring is the way to grow. Every step you take and every human you connect with is a mirror to you, especially in romantic relationships. I dated women who had no problems holding up those mirrors. There were mirrors everywhere! Eventually, I got the point and headed to therapy.

Therapy changed my life. It allowed me to open up and air out all the old scabs that never healed properly.

You know, I have this thing called Nexus. It allows me to bypass the line at the airport simply by scanning my eyes, generating wonder, awareness and curiosity. It reminds me how unique I am and how important it is to stay on my path, discover my personal journey, and unlock and reveal the portals within me. We have yet to reach the peak of our capacity. People talk about how the world is ending. I believe we are just beginning. So don't worry about the outside noise; don't pay too much attention. Decrease the external volume and increase the internal volume.

If you ever question your unique nature or authenticity, think about your iris and your fingerprints. There are seven billion-plus people on this planet, and there's only one authentic you.

Embrace fear and respect the failures because that's where evolution is waiting for you.

Rocking vulnerability feels good. My heart is a little more open today than it was before the talk. I love the path I'm on because I know it's my path to walk.

Three Access Points to the Depths of YOU

I think a lot about the three access points/layers: the body, mind, and spirit. To live a happy life from the inside out, we need two out of three functioning optimally to reach a high level of happiness and present life satisfaction. If you can get all three going, you will reach some next-level success and wisdom.

How do we do this? We exercise the body, mind, and spirit. We train to strengthen the pillars of who we are. Meditation is how I maintain my balance and clarity and experience expansion.

Firstly, I find it easier to live a human life because I live in equanimity, creating space to allow the flow of energy. This enables me to be more adaptable in my external life.

Secondly, meditation allows access to my spirit. The clearer the mind, the easier it is to access my spirit and all the intelligence within and through it. I know it’s a little out there if you’ve never experienced meditation or a spiritual practice, but I promise it is accessible to all. You are accessible to yourself (if that makes any sense). You are an oil field waiting to be tapped, but the only person who can tap into you is, you guessed it, YOU.

Some people have a challenging time accessing or purifying the mind. Their life experience is so intellectual that their minds are stuck in their heads, and breaking the dam to get into their bodies is emotionally and physically painful. So, the best way to do it is to take the back door directly to the spirit.

Welcome to the world of Psychedelics or Religion. You pick and choose what feels suitable for you. There is no one right way; there is no one right path. There is no single path to reach your destination, which is the purification of the mind. It’s your path and your choice as to how you want to reach that destination. More importantly, it’s also your choice whether you even care about reaching that destination and discovering the depths of you.

I remember when a friend shared with me that she knows where the path to self-discovery leads, the path to the purification of the mind and access to her spirit, but she made a conscious decision to say, “I’m not ready; I love my external world and all the goodness that comes with it.” I have an abundance of love for people who make these types of conscious decisions.

It’s your body, your mind, your spirit. It’s your choice.

If the mind is difficult to reach, you can tackle it from both body and spirit. The purification process will be a lot more efficient. My ultimate goal is to run optimally from all three areas. The combination of body and spirit purifies the mind from above and below. It’s like cutting weeds from the top (physical exercise) and simultaneously pulling the roots out from below (spiritual practices such as prayer or psychedelics).

Once we reach the purification of the mind, all dissolve, and spirit, mind, and body synchronize and melt into one, leading to infinite intelligence. I wish there was a magic pill to reach and maintain this state, but there is not. It requires multiple lifetimes of work, although we are in a collective global self-discovery mode, putting the process of waking up on a fast track, and it is beautiful to witness.

Regardless of what is occurring in the mainstream media, or any media for that matter, if you just decide to turn it off for a little while, you will begin to see the beauty that I see. My hope for humanity is to turn down the external volume and increase the internal volume. The world wants to see you. The world wants to experience you. The world needs you.

I’ll end with one of my favourite quotes: “You are more powerful than you think; act accordingly.” – Seth Godin